FRENCH CLASS

Yes it's true, I am learning French. To be honest, I don't have much energy left to learn a language or something after getting worn and torn by education all these years. Can you imagine? I am studying for last whopping 23 years and still have not finished, they say it will take 2 more years to complete (my Ph.D and hence hopefully education too).
But I joined the course for two reasons: 1) they are paying for me. So it’s free, basically! 2) Learning is always justified in this planet as long as we don’t mentally go haywire and start walking around half naked with ruffled hair etc.
Anyways, we are four in the class: an American, a Serbian, one from Yugoslavia and me, Indian- all beginners. If there was anything below beginners, I would have been there. But there wasn't any.
But our professor has not uttered a single word in English so far which is quite scary !
I wonder if she has the evil intention to forcefully press on things into our heads, particularly making me feel like having forcefully overfed with saltless potatoes with hands tied to a pole or something. Or may be she doesn’t know English.
Whatever it is, a professor is speaking only in French in front of four hapless beginners who know nothing about Frence. I must say, really an out of the world combination!
But before jumping to any conclusions, I prefer to wait, may be they have some logic behind it who knows, as they are bonafide citizens of a developed nation!
On the first day, I felt like she was performing some kind of ‘abstract’ mono act play for our amusement. Only thing was she didn't dance. I could understand nothing except the alphabets and numbers she wrote on the white board, thanks to my normal eyes and also to what is called sixth sense. Much to my agony, the Serbian girl sitting beside me kept saying ‘oui’ (means yes). I quickly jumped to a depressing conclusion, “may be I am the most stupid here” But then my self motivation level is quite high you see. I also decided to say OUI come rain or shine…at least (to begin with)
Thus, my French course has finally kicked off with confident OUIs....even the professor seems to be leaping with joy now. Good for us. Whenever I say “OUI”, she exclaims, “Bravo”
That's quite excellent altogether; as it wouldn’t have been too nice to start with NO. Now, things are slowly improving, but I despearately want to go to next level, something better than confident looking OUIs.
Anyway, whatever hell is going on in that cosy classroom, I am so optimistic to come out and quote here in English: "well begun is half done".

CONFESSION

Well, I am a little forgetful; thankfully beloved ones are born in important dates. 25th December for instance! By far the most vulnerable items have been keys, umbrella, pens, wallet, dates, events, so on and so forth. Thanks to the noun or transitive/intransitive verb called FEAR, I really haven't forgotten anything substantial when it comes to beloved ones. Hope legacy will continue in rest of my life too. One can attribute it to my unrelenting love and care too. But personally I don’t want any credit for loving.Anyway, I am a writer. I don’t know, a born writer or not, but surely not fallen from sky or unidentified flying object (UFO).Quite regularly; I write for “peace of mind”, but critics never let it happen, you see. So, most of the time, it turns out be “pieces of mind”- then pieces of heart too. I become sad and decide not to write and publish again. I learn to live with a notion that we are often faulted in speech! But one fine day suddenly I realise we are faulted in silence too. “What the hell?” I ask myself “we are faulted in silence, faulted in speech?”But then choice is definitely ours. Then why not speech?So I have resolved to continue writing come what may-claps or hail stones!Well coming back to my nature, some people find me helpful, others self-fool (I mean selfish). But don’t worry about the latter ones. They are damn crazy! Seriously! Rest is fine. I am quite young, dreams are high, hopes are higher and determination is skyrocketing. May be altitude is in my veins. No wonder I was born in queen of hills (Darjeeling,2134 meters above sea level). No no no, don’t get me wrong now. I don’t have plans to go higher joining NASA! I need space true, but not that one!God bless all of us and our crazy little world !

P.S. I am simple! Forgot to write that.

CRITICISM

When you write something on public website or forum, there is every chance of getting criticised and even abused, especially if you are writing on politics. Only thing is, some use sophisticated language to abuse you, others blunt. The sophisticated abuse is like having a tooth uprooted with some use of local anaesthesia, while blunt is without. Quite same same, but different. Today someone plucked my tooth again, unfortunatly with no anaesthesia. I had written a "feel good" (this word was used by another critic at my article) article on unity of various communities in Darjeeling. My vision was something in the line of 'one world' while writing the article. I don’t have the slightest clue what pissed off this gentleman.
It says:
Dear Wannabe Paper Tiger, wannabe Vikram Seth, no matter how educated you are, doing Ph.D in France or statying in UK, no matter you have good IQ, plenty of cash, strong network, influential family background, have ability to register homepage, strong finance but what is your contribution to the society? Do you have any contribution in Mass education development in Darjeeling, did you support any NGO working against HIV, Drug addiction(Organising Rock Concert is Drug addiction facilating programme),have you ever made survey to remote areas of Darjeeling to get first hand information about the most common diseases our people suffering, why so many kidney damages, how mauch you paid to Dr.Bhutia of Planter’s hospital for that scanning machine, have you ever voiced against rising price of commodities, Child Labour, did you published any article about corrupted & Corruption, contractors and their dada giri? Now stop this historical crapyou’re your pondering on unity and Gorkhaland. Gorkhaland will be true one day when Central will make the resolution that smaller states should depend on their own resources and henceforth no more central fund will be provided. So there will be no special packages from the central. Niche ajao vai, nowadays my son can give you long lecture on Unity and Gorkhaland..se ya man! Atlast, great Da! Heavy da! Keep up man..cool! You are jewel of Darjeeling...please do more da! France ma ta jado cha hola hai! President ko GF lai chai akha na jhim kau hai bro badd gardela ni.

People have written harsher comments than this in the past. But I hardly replied to anyone. But somehow, I found this person is right as well as wrong. Right, because whatever issues he has talked about are genuine. Wrong, he could have conveyed the same thing in much better words like many others. I mean with use of local anaesthesia.Instead, he started off strongly addressing me as PAPER TIGER. Paper tiger? It wasn't amusing at all, so I wrote him back.
P.S. I wrote him back not because he called me paper tiger though, let me clarify quickly or somebody will criticise this blog too, bluntly I mean. There are serious issues! seriously!

So, I wrote:

Dear critic, since you seem to throw personal attack on me rather on my above article, I can’t keep quite for god sake. So, I have addressed all of your concerns here:
Thanks for calling me wanna be “Vikram Seth”, though the “paper tiger” was a little bit off bit and uncalled for. Good IQ? While writing an article or something, I depend on emotion and my attachment to this very place of mist and fog rather than IQ, unlike many of the journalists who come to Darjeeling with half of the sight blocked with monkey cap and robust wrap of mufflers and write ‘wonderful’ history or something about Darjeeling. Plenty of cash? I come from a middle class family of a remote place called Ranglee Rangli ot Tea Garden and I am proud to have seen all the colours of life including poverty. Thankfully, French Government has provided some fellowship to sustain a single life now. Quite ok for a Ph.D. student. Strong network? Well, trust me. Besides my strong will, I just used my bio data and some internet networks to reach where I am now. Influential family background? My father got job (group C) just in early 90s and he looks after two other siblings besides me. Plus he looks after his old dad too. My mother is a house wife. So where did you see a rich and influential family background? My contribution to the society: A) writing songs from last 10 years for almost all the (current) singers and bands of Darjeeling without a single penny from band members. Most of them sustain their living from whatever they earn from music. B) Whenever I come to Darjeeling, I make it a point to donate whatever little I can to beggars vying for attention at Mahakal temple and other areas. I know you will laugh at my miniature contribution to needy ones, but it is not too bad given the fact that I am still a student. C) I was personally associated with various tutorials while I was in siliguri and Darjeeling and am sure many of my students from Darjeeling, Kalimgpong, Kurseong, Siliguri and Sikkim have passed B.Sc. and MSc. with good marks and have better opportunities in their lives. Though I tried to keep the fees as low as possible, couldn’t keep it free as I was also not in very good shape financially. Moreover they say, free means bad or No. I am quite young, just 26 year old, and have some time to do something for my society without being known or heralded or appreciated for what I will do. Perhaps for my own contentment. Well, I have not been associated with any NGO till date, and have not written any article on Child labour, HIV AIDS, corruption, inflation and any of the things you mentioned. But I welcome your suggestion and will do what I can in near future. Thank you for that. Coming back to your remarks on my article, where did you manage to summon “historical crap”? in above article. Please explain to me in next comment.
P.S. Please let us also know about your contributions to society Mr. real tiger.
sincerely, the author

I AM STILL YOUNG
On being questioned if he is studying hard, one of my close friends often replied, “I am so busy with exams that I don’t have time to study”. I could never sense any sense in his amazing sense of humor though. But the way he uttered with no expression on his face, we laughed at everything he said.
He often made us laugh even during stressful moments of exams..
How can we forget the days (or rather nights) when we had more things to put into our cranium than we actually could at that given juncture. I can’t believe gone are those testing moments of life. I guess we have grown old. But when I said the same thing-yes the same thing, “I guess we have grown old” to another good close friend of mine over the phone the other day. He said , “ ke bhako?”
“mota buro bhakcchuina hai..to bhayish hola.biya garekai cchuina, naniharu bhakai cchaina, theth ke ko buro hunthyo!”
(What’s your problem? May be you have aleardy become old, but I have not. I haven’t married as yet, not yet made children. How dare you think we are old?)
It was a good reminder from him. Thanks to my optimistic friends. Times may have changed but they are still same. Never let the negativity touch me….even though there is a huge ocean of it all around.
Just celebrated 26th B‘day a few days back. Only 26, not even one third (As per my target), still long way to go…so much to see, so much to do..so much to learn..